October 29, 2007

The good and the bad

Out getwaway to visit friends this past weekend was a lot of fun. it was nice to catch up on everything going on in each others lives and just hang out like old times. Every time we hang out with them, we end up wishing that we lived a lot closer or could get together more often, but a 2-2 1/2 hour drive makes that difficult. I also managed to survive another weekend with the inlaws without much hassle. Had to put my foot down about my mil not sleeping in bed with the kids, not telling Jacob that he doesn't need to nap anymore (he needs that nap), and not touching my belly without asking just because "that's my grandson." My response to that was "Well, it's my body, and if you think you are entitled to touch me because that's your grandson, why don't I give you a glove, take my pants off and let you feel do a vag exam and feel him directly." The baffled look I got was priceless. Yes, it was a little over the top, but I got my point across.

Work this weekend wasn't too bad Saturday night. I spent 12 hours watching someone do nothing all night. Last night was a different story. I had another "first" last nihgt. We had just enough patients to give us the perfect amount of work. Then a call from ER came that someone was down there with decreases fetal movement. Now some people I work with thing "okay, no biggie, it's just a decreased fetal movement", but not me. It's either going to be nothing , or it's going to be very bad. A lot of times you can tell by looking at the patient, face before you even get them into a gown because they know deep down if the baby is gone. I had to take this patient because the other nurse was in the middle of something. So, I put on my jacket and head in. I spent about 8 minutes looking for the heartbeat and nothing. You still hope that maybe you just aren't geting the monitor in the right place. So I call the doc and let her know the situation and that I'm not getting a heartbeat. It takes her only 6 minutes to get to the hospital to do a sono. And believe me, it felt more like 6 hours. The sono confirmed no cardiac activitiy. She was 32 weeks pregnant. It was absolutely heartwrenching. I've never had someone come in for this and not be able to get a heartbeat. The waiting and hoping that maybe, just maybe it's okay, but really knowing deep down that it's not is one of the most helpless feelings I have ever experieced. I just pray this family finds the comfort and strength they need to get through this.

1 comment:

Brooke (CrazyRN) said...

That is my worst fear of being the 1st one to find no heartbeat.

I'm so sorry.