December 31, 2009

Year in Review

For multiple reasons, I'm glad to say good-bye to 2009. I'm ready to start fresh. Not that 2009 was horrible, but it will forever be the year that I had a miscarriage. It's wasn't all bad. i was able to take a trip to a large hospital supply company with a few other coworkers. There we looked at what our new LDRP's would look like and started working out the kinks. And it looks like we will be breaking ground in March 2010. The project had been on hold until the decision to merge with a large healthcare system came into play. We will have a new name come January 6th. I reached several goals. I breastfed Isaiah for 19 months. I started running again. My jump start to running began after my darling daughter looked at me and said "Mommy, it looks like there is a baby in your belly". And, at that time, there was not. So I started running and I ran 5 5K races and one 5-mile race. The majority of those races, I ran with an old H.S. friend and we reconnected after 10 years. Each race I ran, my times were better than the last and it made me feel great. However, in July, I found myself unexpectedly pregnant and Due march 19, and it happened at what was probably the lowest point in my relationship with Husband. No details, but we were not in a good place at the time. After the shock, we came to embrace this new adventure and worked through the difficulties we needed to get through. Then at the end of August, I started bleeding and was told that pregnancy was no longer viable. The next couple days I felt I was in the deepest depths of pain and loss, felt empty. I delivered the pregnancy in the toilet in the hospital toilet in same day surgery 2 days later. Proceeded with the D&C to be sure all tissue was out, hemorrhaged and went home to grieve. After the weekend, I returned to work, having to face the pain straight on because I work in OB and surrounded by pregnant coworkers, many due Feb-April. It was through those weeks of pregnancy and after the D&C that Husband and I worked through everything and we are stronger for it. Our relationship is the best its been and keeps getting better. Life goes on, and Jacob started 1st grade and is reading very well, and lost his second tooth. Isaiah is weaned and all memory of breastfeeding in his mind is gone. Clara continues to grow and is learning to write all her letters. I feel blessed everyday that I have these 3 kids. We also made the decision to have another child at some point. Next year, I'm looking forward to running again and even running a 5K race with my sister - something we've never done (yes, sis, I'm holding you to it!) Maybe if I can get motivated, I'll try for a half-marathon. Maybe next year will bring another pregnancy, one that will result in a live baby 40 weeks later. We turned another year older and all of us continue to have good health. Christmas came and again my children were spoiled rotten by Santa and family and overall, we had a great holiday. So I guess looking back, 2009 for all the bad spots, turned out alright after all. Here's to looking forward to 2010, hope it finds you all in good health and good fortune. Happy New Year!

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