Time for the Bug Man

It's time to call the bug man. Okay, we live in an old house with a basement. With old houses and basements (probably new houses, too) there come bugs in the spring. I figure since our house has been standing for over 100 years, there are bug families that have set up colonies from many generations back. I do okay with little bugs, I don't like them, but can handle them. We had earwigs at the last house we lived in and I hated those damn things. Ants are gross, I don't really like those damn orange beetles that fly all over and smell if you irritate them, but I can deal with that. It's the big ones that get me. Last year, right before we called an exterminator for ants and little spiders, I woke up to make a midnight bathroom run to see a huge black cockroach in the hallway. Upstairs of all places. I can't stand the sound of crunching bugs, so I tried to put a cup over it. I missed and it chased me. Seriously, it came at me, didn't run away, but came right towards me. I screeched, it ran into Clara's closet. Husband took care of it the next a.m. And the wonderful bug man came and we didn't' have bugs anymore. Maybe a tiny spider, or two. But no more bugs. This a.m., I come home, go into the bathroom, do my thing, and notice this huge bug with big old long legs staring at me. I swear it was probably a square inch. I, again, screamed. I finally got out of the bathroom, and decided I'd drop a book on it to kill it. I thought I heard a small crunch, which grossed me out, so I moved the book. And it jumped at me. Not just once, but 5 times!!! And now it's lost somewhere in the kids toy room. I'm the big giant that could squash it if I had the balls! And it chases me! Somethings not right here. So, I think it's time for my favorite guy this time of year to come visit me. I'll show that damn bug who's boss!